Co-Parenting

Co-Parenting

Struggling with Co-Parenting? We Can Relate.

Relate NI believe children who grow up with parents who have low parental conflict, whether together or separated, enjoy better physical & mental health & emotional wellbeing, higher educational attainment & a lower likelihood of engaging in risky behaviour.

The importance of Co-parenting

Moreover, at Relate NI, we recognize that parents want the best for their children. Therefore, we believe co-parenting is crucial because:

  • For instance, 25% of children whose parents separate have serious long-term social, emotional and psychological problems in adulthood.
  • However, the good news is 75% of children do not face these issues

The Co-Therapy Services

Consequently, this self-referral co-parenting counselling service is designed for parents who are co-parenting or for children and young people (CYP) impacted by co-parenting in their family setups, including separated and/or blended families. Specifically, our co-therapy service is beneficial for those who:

  • Are finding agreement on their co-parenting strategies difficult.
  • Are considering separation.
  • Have recently separated.
  • Separated some time ago.

Co-Parenting From A Young Person's Perspective

Watch this heartfelt video where a young person shares her experience with co-parenting, offering valuable insights and relatable moments.

Co-Parenting from a Young Person’s Perspective

Co-parenting is support and Agreement between adults responsible for the joint care of children.

Successful co-parenting includes:

  • support one another’s actions and decisions;
  • make and stick to agreements about how to raise children;
  • Avoid undermining each other.

In addition, negotiation, respect, and support are at the heart of successful co-parenting.

When co-parents value each other’s contributions, respect, and support each other, including being able to negotiate, research has shown that there are better mental and physical health outcomes for the children involved.

One at a Time Therapy Sessions

Therefore, we provide parents and children with one 50-minute One at a Time Therapy session to address co-parenting issues. If you need further support after this session, we can discuss and provide additional support that suits your situation best.

When to Seek Co-Therapy Services with Relate NI

Similarly, families may benefit from support when experiencing one or more of the following life transition points:

  • Leaving home – partner/older children
  • Relationship breakdown in couple relationship
  • Separation or Divorce
  • Encountering changes in a couple or family relationship
  • Leaving a job / changing career/ changing school
  • Becoming a parent/ child leaving home
  • Retirement or redundancy
  • Adapting to a serious illness or disability
  • Bereavement
  • Moving on after a major life experience
  • Changes to family structure such as new siblings/blended families

Additionally, it is important to seek support during these transitions to ensure the emotional and mental well-being of all family members involved.

Contact Us for Co-Parenting Support

Finally, if you are looking for co-parenting support, either for the parents or child/children, fill out the form below, and we will contact you to discuss your options for the One at a Time Therapy session.

Each session costs £60, whether it is an individual or couple session.

Please note that we allocate appointments on a weekly basis.

FAQ's on Co-Parenting Service

Can Relate NI help with us with children’s routines / schedules?

The focus of the co-parenting work is therapeutic, which means counsellors would not be involved in the children’s daily activities or routines. Over time, the therapeutic work can support co-parents to agree and negotiate; this could include schedules and routines, which can have a positive impact on the child / children and wider family.

We cannot sit in a room together normally, how will this work?

Once a self-referral is made, you will be invited in for an assessment / one at a time session to check if the service is suitable for you. This may be an individual session for both parties, or if appropriate a joint session. Our counsellors are skilled and qualified in delivering relationship support, and will assess each case individually. The counsellor will support both parties in agreeing the structure of ongoing work after the assessment session. Counsellors are also able to recognize when Relate NI may not be the right service and can support you further with signposting or onwards referrals to more suitable services.

What will happen if we do not agree?

Relate NI recognize that parenting can, at times, be a difficult job, especially after conflict or separation. Our counsellors are highly skilled in relationship support, and even if you do not agree, taking part in co-parenting counselling could have long lasting benefits for the child / children involved. Co-parenting counselling can offer a space where agreement, respect and negotiation can be explored in a safe space.

Will the counsellor take sides?

No, our counsellors do not take sides. Co-parenting counselling is confidential and non-judgmental. Counsellors remain neutral and focused on desired outcomes of both parties. Counsellors may offer gentle challenges to both parties, in the interest of meeting desired outcomes and desired improvements for the child / children involved.

Does Relate NI provide reports for solicitors / courts?

Relate NI Co-parenting counselling is confidential and carried out within strict professional boundaries. We keep brief, factual records stored security for a period of time, then destroyed. Our management information systems comply with data protection regulations and all records on the system are anonymised.

While confidentially it protected there are certain exceptional circumstances in which a counsellor may be under legal or ethical duty to disclose information. These exceptional circumstances are in place to ensure client safety, the safety of others and to comply with legislation. Relate NI are aware of these responsibilities and will disclose information in these circumstances to the relevant bodies.

Usually, we do not release updates or completed reports on counselling sessions.

What affect will this have on the children?

Co-parenting counselling can support both parents work together to make decisions regarding their child’s upbringing. Taking part in co-parenting counselling can support effective communication, sharing information and coordinating schedules to ensure the child spends quality time with both parents. This can be beneficial for children as it provides a stable, consistent, and supportive environment. This is linked to higher self-esteem, improved academic performance, and better mental health overall in children.

What if there is already supervised contact, will this affect this arrangement?

No, Relate NI are not a statutory service. Taking part in Co-parenting counselling has no legal impact on any court / contact orders that might be in place.

What if the children refuse to be co-parented?

Relate NI want the best outcome for the child / children involved, and the co-parents. Counsellor will provide a supportive environment to facilitate open and honest conversations about what is best for the child.

Online Enquiry Form

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“How Relate NI helps people”

Our counsellor was excellent and really helped me and my husband to resolve the niggles in our relationshipService Attended Adult Relationship Counselling for Couples
My counsellor was lovely, attentive and supportive. She helped me to understand my worth and for that, I will always be gratefulService Attended Adult Relationship Counselling for Individuals
This service is invaluable. Such lovely people to meet and help you through difficult times.Service Attended Adult Relationship Counselling for Couples
The service was excellent, my counsellor was really good at getting us to open up and helping us to get to the root of our issues. We have definitely improved our communication since attending.Service Attended Adult Relationship Counselling for Couples
I found the Relationship MOT an excellent method of focusing on how we work as a couple and just as importantly, where we need to work. It was professional, insightful and well worth the time. It has reminded us of how much we have to be proud of in our relationship and why it is so important to occasionally review it with experts.Service Attended Relationship MOT
I would definitely recommend using the Relationship MOT service as a bit of a check in with your partner. I thought how the counsellor was able to steer the conversation was very insightful and nuanced. The MOT reminded us about why we are great together but also the importance of communication and respect.” “Our counsellor provided an outside perspective which immediately helped us to agree that we needed to stop and think with more kindness and empathy for each other especially when stressed or pissed off. We both felt that our counsellor’s excellent and gentle facilitation was quite invigorating. So many positives!Service Attended Relationship MOT 2
Very Interesting Content. I like the concept of preparing your relationship before you have problemsService Attended Sustaining Healthy Relationships – Surestart 4
The face to face programme has made me feel connected with others experiencing similar thingsService Attended Sustaining Healthy Relationships – Surestart 3
The workshops made me more confident to balance family life after the baby's arrivalService Attended Sustaining Healthy Relationships – Surestart 2
I now have a better understanding of myself, it is good to know that it is normal to have argumentsService Attended Sustaining Healthy Relationships – Surestart 1
I felt the weekly questionnaire, couples with the counsellor's understanding of my needs help contribute to my own understanding of my mental health and needs throughout.Service Attended Adult Relationship Counselling for Individuals
I loved every session. Our counsellor listened to what we had to say and gave us helpful wee homework - would recommend this service to everybodyService Attended Adult Relationship Counselling for Couples
Our counsellor was a fantastic support - we now feel strong enough to continue working on our relationship togetherService Attended Adult Relationship Counselling for Couples
I had a very good counsellor that helped me through a lot and it has made me come out the other side.Service Attended Adult Relationship Counselling for Individuals
Counselling took us from a bad place to a good one and I would return if neededService Attended Adult Relationship Counselling For Couples
Been a lifeline to help us fall in love again - forever grateful!Service Attended Adult Relationship Counselling For Couples
I would just like to say that when I first came for counselling I felt that I was drowning.  I have completed my sessions and I now feel that I can cope a lot better with everything.  Thank you for a brilliant service.Service Attended Adult Relationship Counselling For Individuals
Thank you Relate NI for a good nights sleep.Service Attended Relate NI Kids Counselling
Really enjoyed Relate NI and I'm actually going to miss counselling.  I Found it helpful to find myself again. Very fair and equal within our relationship.Service Attended Adult Relationship Counselling For Couples
The counsellor was very pleasant to meet with.  They had the necessary skills to speak and listen when appropriate.  I liked their humour and good personality.Service Attended Family Counselling
Relate NI has helped me move on as well as understand myself and situation more.  My counsellor listened to me, facilitated me and was compassionate!Service Attended Relate NI Teen Counselling
I felt the weekly questionnaire, coupled with counsellor's understanding of my needs helped contribute to my own understanding of my mental health and needs throughoutService Attended Adult Relationship Counselling For Individuals
We had four funded sessions and cannot express how grateful we are for the help, guidance and knowledge. Our counsellor was incredibly professional, and her experience and obvious passion for helping couples like us was exceptional. She helped us to understand ourselves and each other like we otherwise never would have been able to.Service Attended Adult Relationship Counselling For Couples
I have tried counselling many times in the past. This time actually made a difference. I was able to complete online sessions as well as some face to face.Service Attended Adult Relationship Counselling For Individuals
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